Parishioners’ Dismay
“I and fellow parishioners have watched in dismay the decline of our parish, from a once vibrant faith community to one just limping along with nothing more than pro forma liturgies, alienated parishioners and destructive use of resources.  Regrettably, our pastor, a good person, is not fitted to be a pastor.  Trust in others is sadly lacking.  He has reversed pastoral council decisions arrived at in good faith and often initiated demoralizing actions without consulting anyone.  Is there anything a parish can do when there is utter failure of leadership, when all reasonable attempts to deter parish deterioration have been fruitless?” 
This recent email comes from a person we know to be a level-headed, conscientious parishioner, not one to readily complain.  A complaint from another parish arrived soon after.  The leader wrote, “We have taken so many steps back that it is a huge disappointment because we had come so far.  The new pastor is not a ‘meeting’ person and likes to make all the decisions.  I personally am frustrated and many parishioners share my frustration.”  From yet another parish came this: “The parish is hemorrhaging.  A number of people are not attending any church, others are ‘shopping,’ while others are remaining and are resisting openly.”

Can Anything Be Done?
These are hard stories to read, even more to live through.  It is difficult for the pastor as well when people express anger and withdraw support.  “It’s only a small group who are upset,” the pastor might rationalize.  “Let them go to a parish they find more to their liking.”  This is not what most parishioners desire.  A large percentage of people can be alienated by insensitive and dismissive attitudes coming from the pastor but they still refuse to give up and go elsewhere.  Their parish is a spiritual home that is filled with long and fond memories that can not be replaced by attending another church or faith community that is not their own.  What to do when people find the pastor’s behavior, as one person put it, “suspicious, reclusive and close-minded?”

Possible Options
1.  Start with prayer, both personal reflection and group discernment.  What is God’s plan for the parish in the midst of this turmoil?  What is the Spirit asking us to do?  Gather in prayer groups to discover answers.
2.  Learn the facts; don’t depend on hearsay.  Document over a period of months, for instance, how many are attending the Masses and how this has changed.  Compare, over time, notices in the bulletin to see what has been dropped or what added.  Listen to people’s concrete experience, straining out feelings, suppositions or false judgments.  Try to identify and clearly define the issues or problems people have with the pastor. 
3.  Be realistic about what can be accomplished or changes implemented.  This might mean seeking out those who agree with your position and gain their support, as well as connecting with those who oppose your viewpoint to discover what information they are working out of or what common ground might exist. 
4.  Seek out those who have the pastor’s ear, those who can approach him in a non-confrontational manner and have his trust.  See if they share your concerns and would be willing to talk to the pastor about them. 
5.  Allow the pastor to save face.  Backing him into a corner will only cause more hostility and friction.  Affirm the pastor in an honest and direct way whenever possible.  Better to build bridges than do battle.
6.  As a last resort, inform the bishop, in a respectful and conciliatory manner, of the information uncovered and the efforts made to reach an understanding with the pastor.  It may not change anything but it helps in dealing with one’s own frustration.  You have made an attempt to serve the People of God through prayer, documentation, gentle confrontation and bridge-building.  The rest is in God’s hands.

Tom Sweetser, SJ and Wendy Rappé 
www.pepparish.org
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Parish Newsletter - March 2011
A Service of the Parish Evaluation Project
Milwaukee, Wisconsin